over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again.

we're ALL like that. gosh. God save us.

maybe it's the easier way out. but where's the joy in that. there's no depth. no feel-good moment. fleeting as it is. i guess i need to make up my mind before it happens and i screw it up. what's the rush? there's no rush. there's just this plan. there's a sense of unwanted differentiation. sometimes i feel helpless. worse than i know i am. because there's this checklist. maybe a reverse checklist. longer than i'd like it to be. but there shouldn't be a checklist. it should just.. BE.

so many plans. hopes. dreams. just waiting to happen....

i should stop planning. i should just be.

let's see what unfolds for me in 2011. i hope it's something truly special. i'm not going to plan. i'll just let it happen.

so there.

:)